I have to do this.
I have to do that.
I have to be there.
I have to be here.
How many times a day do you say, “I have to”?
I don’t know about anyone else but I know that I find myself saying the words “have to” way more times than I even notice.
Luckily I have my little six year old to call me out. If the “H” word happens to cross my mouth, she stops what she is doing, looks at me with an incredulous face and in one of her best imitations of me she emphatically says: “Eeeema (Hebrew for Mommmmy), you don’t HAVE to. You WANT to.” You got me kid. I don’t have to. I choose to. (more…)
There are a lot of misconceptions about depression, mainly because people say things like “I’m so depressed” when, in fact, they’re simply sad. It’s like saying you have a migraine when, in fact, you have a headache. There’s a vast difference between the two…they’re not even remotely the same!
The worst misconception is the one which adds to the suffering of someone who is clinically depressed – the idea that they can “will themselves” out of it. That they must just “change their attitude and be more grateful for what they have”. That is like saying to a diabetic that (if they want it badly enough) they’ll be able to control their insulin levels without medication! (more…)
It is a truth universally acknowledged that every parent has experienced the pain of stepping on a Lego. Some day, hundreds of thousands of years from now, archaeologists will discover our perfectly preserved bodies and wonder what those evenly spaced circular dents on the soles of our feet are.
The first time I had a serious run-in with one of my kids’ toys was when my younger son James was two. I got up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, and I walked smack-bang into a toy truck. If the truck had been made of plastic it wouldn’t have been so bad, but it was made of metal.
My foot connected with a sharp corner of the truck and I got a fair-sized gash. Because this happened during a rare moment in which both kids were asleep at the same time, I couldn’t howl in pain and hop around on one leg. I had to just stand there and bleed quietly.
Five years later, I still have a scar on my right foot. And James still has the offending truck. In fact, both of my boys still have just about every toy they have ever owned since the day they were born. My attempts to get rid of some of them have not gone well. (more…)
As I pulled up to the car pool line I passed the neighbor’s car as she finished dropping off and headed back home. We gave a quick wave and went on our way.
I dropped Jackson off and watched as he slowly made his way into school without a care in the world. And just when I thought he had long forgotten about me he turned around, cracked a smile and waved. I shed a few tears as I drove off, and reminded myself that letting him go and grow is a good thing! It’s out of my comfort zone at times which can be scary, but it’s good for him, for me, for us.
A few minutes later a text popped up on my cell phone. It was from my neighbor.
“Sometimes I get teary eyed dropping off the kids at school and thinking of Newtown”
“Me too” I replied. Me too. (more…)
2013 is still fresh out of the oven, and I’m already starting to feel like I’m dragging my feet.
I don’t know about you but I wish things could slow down a little, and that I could breathe out some stress and breathe in more joy…
As a mum, there are many things I want to do.
I wanna play with my kids, and teach them useful things, things that mold their character and resilience.
I want time to work on my dreams, to grow and develop my skills, to read more books and learn from great writers.
I wanna be a perfect wife running a clock-work household.
I wanna have time to sit and sip away, journalling in a cafe, and feel free to be myself again.
“Come here, baby…”
He snuggled closer to me, allowing me to inhale a faint smell of his shampoo on his thick, getting-too-long hair.
For a boy who is no longer a baby who can be dead stubborn about his ways sometimes, I am lucky he still wants to snuggle close to his mother.
His working mother that is.
Yes, I returned to the corporate world last December after being a work-from-home mom for almost a year.
While I enjoyed returning to my old job, excited that my previous employer offered it to me, and happy to see my old friends again, there’s part of me that feels guilty – again.
Same old cycle of guilt…the working mom’s guilt. (more…)