SOUTH AFRICA: Unwritten

Unwritten

On my way to work this morning, the song “Unwritten” by Natasha Bedingfield played on the radio. I’ve heard the song many times before. This morning, I really paid attention to the lyrics for the first time, and reflected upon my own goals.

Many of us feel trapped in the routine of our daily life. We’ve all said at some point that we don’t have enough time. I’ve been using this excuse for two important goals in my life: decluttering my home, and writing my novel. These are things that I know will make me feel happy and proud of having accomplished them. The truth is that none of us “have” time, we “make” time to do what we really want to do. So I must ask myself the question, “Why have I not made time for the two goals that I’d most like to accomplish?”

The clutter in my home is complicated, as much of it was inherited from my husband’s family. For that reason, I feel that my husband must make the decision regarding what to keep and what to sell. Of course, there is no excuse for me not to get rid of my own clutter!

I know that my almost pathological fear of giving things away stems from my childhood. My parents were terrible at managing our family finances, and in our house, it was feast or famine. When my parents had money, they’d literally buy champagne and caviar. When they had none, we had to make do with “mystery” tins (we had a box of tins without labels). I guess it’s the fear of being without that holds me back from doing what I should in this regard. The ultimate irony is that I usually can’t find what I need, when I need it, anyway!

This brings me to my unwritten novel, which I have dreamt of writing for as long as I can remember. A couple of years ago, I signed up to NaNoWriMo, and started to work on my goal in earnest. Then I was diagnosed with lupus and psoriasis – two severe autoimmune diseases that have since wrecked havoc on my life. I was unable to type due to numbness and pain in my arms and hands. Since then, I have abandoned my goal of writing my novel. While my health challenges are certainly a handicap, I suspect that the real obstacle isn’t lack of time or my health, it’s fear. As long as my novel remains unwritten, it can’t be rejected. I can hold on to my dream of being an author “one day”, whereas if I write it and it’s not good enough, I would have to give up on the dream.

You would think that, given the above insights, I’d be able to overcome my psychological hurdles and get on with it. I’m happy to be able to confirm that I’ve started taking baby steps in the right direction. I have given away two large bags full of clothes I no longer wear, and I’ve started writing for World Moms Network again.

To paraphrase Unwritten: each day we get a brand new chance to “begin our book.” No one else can do or say what we are meant to do and say. We’re all unique, and therefore uniquely qualified for whatever it is that we’re meant to accomplish in our lifetimes.

What goals do you have,  but “don’t have time” for? If you have already published a book, do you have any advice for us aspirant authors?

This is an original post for World Moms Blog by Mama Simona from Cape Town, South Africa.

Photo credit: Caleb Roenigk / Flickr.

Mamma Simona (South Africa)

Mamma Simona was born in Rome (Italy) but has lived in Cape Town (South Africa) since she was 8 years old. She studied French at school but says she’s forgotten most of it! She speaks Italian, English and Afrikaans. Even though Italian is the first language she learned, she considers English her "home" language as it's the language she's most comfortable in. She is happily married and the proud mother of 2 terrific teenagers! She also shares her home with 2 cats and 2 dogs ... all rescues. Mamma Simona has worked in such diverse fields as Childcare, Tourism, Library Services, Optometry, Sales and Admin! (With stints of SAHM in-between). She’s really looking forward to the day she can give up her current Admin job and devote herself entirely to blogging and (eventually) being a full-time grandmother!

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NEW ZEALAND: How Facebook Saved Me

NEW ZEALAND: How Facebook Saved Me

Maybe you’re the same? I get teased a lot about my Facebook use. But not by people who get it.

Five years ago, I was in a miserable marriage and experiencing phenomenally low energy levels. I wonder now if I was bordering on depression. I had a nine year-old, a six year-old and a two year-old, and my life pretty much revolved around them because I had to choose to do one thing well. I was 43 and experiencing some intense bleeding as part of peri-menopause and my iron levels were teeny as a result, I was seriously sleep-deprived and I was trying to convince the world I was right about everything.

I was prickly to those who annoyed me and many people annoyed me. I was very, very fragile. I was trying to keep my boys protected from some  intense dysfunction within their wider world, and ensure they felt loved but not entitled. I felt isolated and I had some serious self-development to do. I had baggage I needed to sort out. It wasn’t my fault I was in this state but it was my responsibility to change it.

To be clear: I have many dear friends in real life and lots of things I can talk about. I am interested in stuff. But most of my people are busy parents who aren’t always available. My interests have always been eclectic, so finding those who can sensibly discuss things I want to discuss is rare, when in survival mode, it was impossible. Personal development wasn’t new to me but it was on the backburner because there was no space in my head. So I joined Facebook, and it began.

Have you changed after using Facebook? It may seem weird to those who haven’t had it as a lifeline. I did. I found one mini tribe after another that shared my interests: I could be part of a group that got *this* but didn’t have to know *that* about me. I was given new information and new skills to learn. I became more circumspect about whom I told what. I could chat with people at 5.00am or 12.00pm, when no one in my real world was around. I had proper fun for the first time in years. I learned to laugh and tease and flirt with men, and to put in boundaries to maintain greater self-respect, and not be fazed when people didn’t resonate with me and ghosted. I learned a lot about speaking in a way that I could be heard and listening to understand, not to respond. I learned about some really alternative ways of looking at the world.

I learned to be the me I had been before other people had convinced me to be something else that suited them. I ditched the shell and found a spine.

And the response has been outstandingly positive. My sense of self has soared. I have slowly translated all my new self into the real world and am loving life in a way I could never have predicted. I am healthy all round. How about you? Does your online life reflect your real life? It’s an interesting thing to ponder.

As things do, this has cycled around: I am now faced with the reality that some of my online people are Trump people and therefore, not my people. The internet has limitations: no tone of voice, no body language, no instantaneous vibe to resonate with… or not. Interpersonal cues take longer to decipher. It’s a curious thing and I understand why those who don’t get it, don’t get it. In the end it comes down to this: I value my mini-tribes in ways that anti-Facebook people will probably never understand. Cheers to you all and a heartfelt, thank you.

What’s your Facebook experience been like? Are you even on Facebook?

 

 

Karyn Wills

Karyn is a teacher, writer and solo mother to three sons. She lives in the sunny wine region of Hawke’s Bay, New Zealand in the city of Napier.

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USA: @SaveTheChildren Lights Up Empire State Building Red for Girls’ Rights #SheShines

USA: @SaveTheChildren Lights Up Empire State Building Red for Girls’ Rights #SheShines

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Save the Children lit up the Empire State Building red on October 11th, 2016 for International Day of the Girl, attracting attention to the rights of girls worldwide. Seen here is actress, Dakota Fanning, Save’s CEO and President, Carolyn Miles and from L-R super girls Colette, Miracle, Katie and Antonella. Photo credit: Save the Children

Look UP, New Yorkers!!! For the first time EVER the Empire State Building is RED today for International Day of the Girl!! This morning, World Moms Network was invited to cover Save the Children’s lighting of the Empire State Building in New York City. The ceremony included Carolyn Miles, President and CEO of Save the Children, actress Dakota Fanning, and 4 strong girls — Colette, Antonella, Kate and Miracle — who may appear small, but have incredibly large hearts. The girls used their voices today to make a statement for the rights of girls everywhere.

Kate is an American girl of 10 years old from Connecticut who sponsors two girls through Save the Children, one in Ethiopia and one in Uganda. She says that she sends a lot of letters to her girl counterparts overseas!

“Life is very different for the girls. They can’t just go to a supermarket like we do. They have to grow their own food.”, says Kate.

Kate explained that the girls have to walk to school, and their school is not very close. She says, “I can just take the bus and get to school in 15 minutes. They can’t.” Her sponsored children also don’t have as much time for after school activities like sports because they have to help out at home.

Kate dreams of going to Ethiopia and Uganda to meet her friends. Her sponsorship started as a holiday gift, and she enjoyed the global friendship so much that she asked to sponsor another girl.

Why the importance of focusing on girls? Carolyn Miles, CEO of Save the Children states,

“Girls are twice as likely to never start school than boys. And there are more girls out of school than boys.”

So not fair, right????

Some of the global issues that keep girls from getting the chance to hit the books are child marriage, societal pressures to help out at home while their brothers go to school, menstruation, and more.

Raising awareness to the issue was actress and artist, Dakota Fanning, who attracted the paparazzi to a cause that she is very passionate about. Dakota is a Save the Children Ambassador, and she spoke to the press about the importance of getting more girls in school worldwide. She totally shines. Please do follow and use the hashtag #SheShines to tell us who inspires you on this International Day of the Girl. Thank you, Dakota, for using your large platform for girls!

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Save the Children Ambassador, Dakota Fanning, at the top of the Empire State Building for International Day of the Girl on October 11th, 2016. #SheShines Photo credit: Save the Children

Miracle joined the kid sponsors on the platform, but her story is not one of sponsorship, but of being sponsored in rural South Carolina. She was proud to join Save the Children to speak up for girls like her and seemed to hit it off instantly with her new girlfriends!

From L-R: Save the Children girl power: Kate, Miracle, Colette and Antonella.

From L-R: Save the Children girl power: Kate, Miracle, Colette and Antonella. Photo credit: Save the Children.

World Moms Network is proud of these girls for raising their voices for girls everywhere! If you’d like to sponsor a child, please go to Save the Children.

Here’s a sneak peak at the red Empire State Building! (Better photo to come!)

The Empire State Building was lit red on October 11th, 2016 for International Day of the Girl by Save the Children. Photo credit to Marshall Kanfer.

The Empire State Building was lit red on October 11th, 2016 for International Day of the Girl by Save the Children. Photo credit to Marshall Kanfer.

This is an original post to World Moms Network’s founder and CEO, Jennifer Burden in New Jersey, USA. Jennifer is the proud sponsor of a girl in the USA through Save the Children and voluntarily covered this story. 

Jennifer Burden

Jennifer Burden is the Founder and CEO of World Moms Network, an award winning website on global motherhood, culture, human rights and social good. World Moms Network writes from over 30 countries, has over 70 contributors and was listed by Forbes as one of the “Best 100 Websites for Women”, named a “must read” by The New York Times, and was recommended by The Times of India. She was also invited to Uganda to view UNICEF’s family health programs with Shot@Life and was previously named a “Global Influencer Fellow” and “Social Media Fellow” by the UN Foundation. Jennifer was invited to the White House twice, including as a nominated "Changemaker" for the State of the World Women Summit. She also participated in the One Campaign’s first AYA Summit on the topic of women and girl empowerment and organized and spoke on an international panel at the World Bank in Washington, DC on the importance of a universal education for all girls. Her writing has been featured by Baby Center, Huffington Post, ONE.org, the UN Foundation’s Shot@Life, and The Gates Foundation’s “Impatient Optimists.” She is currently a candidate in Columbia University's School of International and Public Affairs in the Executive Masters of Public Affairs program, where she hopes to further her study of global policies affecting women and girls. Jennifer can be found on Twitter @JenniferBurden.

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WORLD VOICE: International Day of the Girl

WORLD VOICE: International Day of the Girl

Photo by Michelle Amarante

Today we celebrate girls around the world for International Day of the Girl. In 2012 the U.N. declared October 11th as The International Day of The Girl.  In 2016 Girls and women are still dispropotionately  facing discrimination, oppression, and subjugation around the world but a shift is underway.  With girls and women figured prominently into the Sustainable Development Goals as SDG 5, Gender Equality, the world seems to be waking up to the fact that  it is a problem to leave half the population behind. To educate a girl, is to educate a community,   when girls are excluded from the education process, a nation is cheated out of half of its full potential.

“Gender equality is not only a fundamental human right, but a necessary foundation for a peaceful, prosperous and sustainable world.” – United Nations

Here are some facts from the UN:

  • About two thirds of countries in the developing regions have achieved gender parity in primary education
  • In Southern Asia, only 74 girls were enrolled in primary school for every 100 boys in 1990. By 2012, the enrolment ratios were the same for girls as for boys.
  • In sub-Saharan Africa, Oceania and Western Asia, girls still face barriers to entering both primary and secondary school.
  • Women in Northern Africa hold less than one in five paid jobs in the non-agricultural sector. The proportion of women in paid employment outside the agriculture sector has increased from 35 per cent in 1990 to 41 per cent in 2015
  • In 46 countries, women now hold more than 30 per cent of seats in national parliament in at least one chamber.

Only with equality can a community truly rise to its full potential. Girl are our future, and today we celebrate all girls around the world.

 

 

 

 

 

Photos:  Elizabeth Atalay

This is an original post written by Elizabeth Atalay for World Moms Blog.

How do you celebrate girls around the world?

Elizabeth Atalay

Elizabeth Atalay is a Digital Media Producer, Managing Editor at World Moms Network, and a Social Media Manager. She was a 2015 United Nations Foundation Social Good Fellow, and traveled to Ethiopia as an International Reporting Project New Media Fellow to report on newborn health in 2014. On her personal blog, Documama.org, she uses digital media as a new medium for her background as a documentarian. After having worked on Feature Films and Television series for FOX, NBC, MGM, Columbia Pictures, Warner Brothers, 20th Century Fox, and Castle Rock Pictures, she studied documentary filmmaking and anthropology earning a Masters degree in Media Studies from The New School in New York. Since becoming a Digital Media Producer she has worked on social media campaigns for non-profits such as Save The Children, WaterAid, ONE.org, UNICEF, United Nations Foundation, Edesia, World Pulse, American Heart Association, and The Gates Foundation. Her writing has also been featured on ONE.org, Johnson & Johnson’s BabyCenter.com, EnoughProject.org, GaviAlliance.org, and Worldmomsnetwork.com. Elizabeth has traveled to 70 countries around the world, most recently to Haiti with Artisan Business Network to visit artisans in partnership with Macy’s Heart of Haiti line, which provides sustainable income to Haitian artisans. Elizabeth lives in New England with her husband and four children.

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Did you catch Orana Velarde’s post on @BabyCenter?

orana-velarde

As part of World Moms Blog’s collaboration with BabyCenter’s Mission Motherhood®, our World Moms have been writing posts on maternal health around the world. We have made it to the finish line, and this is the last and 24th post in the incredible one-year series!

Orana Velarde in Srilanka interviewed 8 mothers in Sri Lanka and discovered a diversity of new baby traditions:

“Recently, my family and I moved to Sri Lanka, an island country in the Indian Ocean, off the southeastern coast of India. I know, not your everyday, run of the mill motherhood adventure, but that’s my life!

Once here, it was not long until I began to wonder about the customs and experiences of the local mothers. Sri Lanka has four official religions, Hinduism, Buddhism, Islam and Christianity. Every religion has different beliefs and ceremonies, which makes this land a very rich cultural experience. What was I missing out on? What would surprise me? So, I took to my local mother’s group to interview some moms, eight of them, in fact! The results were exciting…”

Read the full post, Sri Lankan baby traditions: Shaved heads, chanting and more!, over at BabyCenter’s Mission Motherhood®!

Thank you to BabyCenter for the opportunity to provide content on maternal health from around the world this past year, and thank you to all of our World Moms who participated in the series!

World Moms Blog

World Moms Blog is an award winning website which writes from over 30 countries on the topics of motherhood, culture, human rights and social good. Over 70 international contributors share their stories from around the globe, bonded by the common thread of motherhood and wanting a better world for their children. World Moms Blog was listed by Forbes Woman as one of the "Best 100 Websites for Women 2012 & 2013" and also called a "must read" by the NY Times Motherlode in 2013. Our Senior Editor in India, Purnima Ramakrishnan, was awarded the BlogHer International Activist Award in 2013.

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