Before I got pregnant, I had one fear, and it was never about childbirth: I was terrified of breastfeeding. I am not sure where it came from, or what specifically made me go into panic mode about it, but it almost looked unnatural to me. Having spent so much time in Asia, breastfeeding was just not seen or done much in public. I also don’t have many younger cousins, so naturally, I wasn’t exposed to it.
When I got pregnant, I spent months plagued with anxiety, researching and keeping my breastfeeding fears to myself. I finally blurted it all out during a big, pregnant “I-am-not-fit-to-be-a-Mother” meltdown in front of my husband. He tried not to laugh, and asked “Is this your only concern?” I had to pause, and think. Well, yes, I was set about everything else. But for some reason, breastfeeding just freaked me out! (more…)
Of all of my parenting decisions, my choice to use cloth diapers raises the most eyebrows.
People tend to treat it like an admirable but inconvenient decision that they would never seriously consider themselves, like converting your car to run on vegetable oil or biking everywhere instead of driving.
They see it as difficult, and a little weird.
This bothers me, because I think my choice is more convenient, not less.
I use a diaper service, Happy Nappy, and since they bring my diapers to my door and take them away from me on a weekly basis, you could argue that my choice is actually lazier than using disposables, since I never have to go shopping for diapers. I don’t deal with any more poop than a parent who uses disposables. In fact, since I find that disposables have a deplorable tendency to leak poop down my baby’s leg, I actually deal with more poop when he’s in disposables.
Their cost is comparable to disposables – around $25 a week – and service becomes free after you’ve been with them for 30 months, because kids usually potty train earlier in cloth diapers. So either my kid will be potty trained by 30 months, or I get free diapers. That makes it a cheaper choice, even with the convenience of a diaper service.
So here I am, making a cheaper and more convenient choice, but people respond as though I was hand-knitting my entire family’s wardrobe or something. (more…)
As I watch my almost ten year old son struggle with peer pressure and the need to find his own way in the world of 4th grade adolescents, I am transported back to my own struggle as an awkward 6th grader, a time when I was caught between being faithful to my friends or being honest and true to myself.
I failed at being true to myself—
The room was quiet. Tense breathing and pencils scratching, the only sounds to be heard. As I sat there, studying my own test, I felt C’s pencil tap me lightly on the shoulder.
As I snuck a glance backwards, she waved the folded note in her hand and nodded towards K, who sat in front of me. I sighed. It seemed easy, just pass the note with the test answers to K. I knew they were the test answers because C had told us the day before that she had them.
All I had to do was pass the note to K when C was done using them.
I could use them after K, although I wasn’t much for cheating. My lack of a social life left plenty of time for studying.
All I had to do was pass the note from one girl to the other. Easy. I glanced up at the teacher, she was watching everyone intently. It would take some quick maneuvers to get the note passed. (more…)
As I stood in the kindergarten pick up line, I told another mom I was about to start the potty-training process with my littlest guy. I told her it had been a while since I had done it and would love any advice. I’ve used the excuse of putting it of because of our recent move [from Switzerland back to the US] for too long and it was time for both my son and me to face the beast.
She mentioned that her son had potty-trained himself. Um, that’s amazing. All I could think about was the pile of “accident undies” on my laundry room floor and my son’s attempts to empty the potty on his own (and the multiple, potential spills on the floor that would come with it). Happy for her, sure! But wishing it could be that easy for us too.
Funny enough, just days before my friend and I had been talking about the process of kids learning to ride bikes. She noticed that our oldest son was riding without training wheels. Her son was struggling to give up training wheels. I told her that my husband had been building up to teaching our oldest but that 5 minutes after removing the training wheels he was off on his own. No help needed. We could take no credit! We barely got a picture of the accomplishment because he was off!
Isn’t motherhood like that though? Some things come so easily to one child or mother and to others it is so painfully hard.
Breastfeeding, potty-training, giving birth, discipline, homework, feeding, you name it and it’s likely for some those things have come easy with minimal heartache and for others, they have struggled so much with few positive results. (more…)
This week’s Saturday Sidebar Question comes from World Moms Blog writer Susie Newday. She asked our writers,
“What was your best ever family vacation and why?”
Check out what some of our World Moms had to say…
Photo of a beach in Boracay, Philippines, courtesy of Alison Lee