Have you ever been doing something while thinking that it was to help another person, only to realize it was for you, too? This has been the story of my life recently.
I have been living in New York for the past month and a half, getting my youngest son started on his career and getting my oldest son settled into his new apartment with his two roommates. He’s starting college at NYCDA (New York Conservatory for the Dramatic Arts), and it’s his first time out on his own in NY — what a place to learn about life.
I couldn’t just throw him out to the wolves — I refused to! Thankfully, my youngest son and I were blessed to stay at their apartment and slept on one of his roommates’ sleeper couches in the living room. It was interesting to say the least, but it made me an even better woman, a stronger more faith based woman. It was a journey I’ll appreciate for a lifetime.
I had my ideas of what was going to happen to us while we were visiting New York, but like always, there was another plan of action already in effect, and I didn’t even know it.
My plan was to stay for a couple of weeks, and my youngest was going to stay for four days. I wrote a list of all the people I had planned to meet. I wanted to set up these big deals and start making all of this money. I knew how it was all going to go down…so I thought.
Instead, I met only two of the ten people I intended to meet and hung out with the people I thought were the “seasonal” people. The people I thought were just here for NOW. lol. I had no idea that the people I ended up hanging out with would actually be the people I was going to be learning from and become friends with.
I learned so much being here. I learned how to handle the answer “No” and how to enjoy the answer “Yes.”
The old me came back, and this time she’s here to stay! Being in New York, I definitely acquired thick skin. The hustle and bustle of the people got my entrepreneurial juices flowing. It showed me that if I do all that I can, I can and will live out every dream I have.
We, as moms, always do things with the thought of our kids. We put everyone ahead of us. I’m learning to look out for me first. That is such a challenging thing, but it’s true. As mothers we need to love us first so that we love others best!
Years ago when I flew I remember how I’d get so upset when the flight attendant would tell us that if the plane was to go down to put our breathing mask on before we put the mask on our children. I would say that if it came down to it I’d STILL put it on my boys’ first!
Now that I look back on it, I understand. I understand that if I didn’t live and if I wasn’t ok, they wouldn’t be ok because who’d be around to help them survive?! That should translate over into our every day lives.
This trip wasn’t just for my son, it was for my growth too. Change is always good because it builds character. I’m ready forr the next level, and I know you are too, so let’s make this change together. Let’s love ourselves Just As Much as we love everyone else.
What about you? Do you do enough for yourself as a mother?
This has been an original post to World Moms Blog by Dr. Jeanelle Marshawn Lanham, aka The SWAG Doc, of Arizona, USA. You can also find her on her blog, The SWAG Doc.
Photo credit to Andrew Stawarz. This photo has a creative commons no derivatives license.