UNITED ARAB EMIRATES: Doing the dirty work…or not

UNITED ARAB EMIRATES: Doing the dirty work…or not

A friend came to our apartment the other day and said “Wow, your place is always so clean!”

I looked at her. “Well, I pay someone,” I said. “Duh.”

Until we moved to Abu Dhabi, I’d never had someone clean my house. I didn’t grow up with “help,” although I imagine my mother sometimes felt like the underpaid scullery maid.  I went to a friend’s house for a holiday weekend once, in college, and when we got there, her mother said that if I needed something ironed, I should just leave it out “for the girl”. I was confused: the only other woman in the house was a middle-aged African American woman.  I wore a wrinkled shirt to the party.

All of which is to say, until I hit forty-seven  recently, I was my own domestic help.

Don’t worry, I’m not going to re-hash The Help; instead I’m writing about how strange — and dangerously seductive — it is to live suddenly in a world where “help” – and lots of it – is readily available, even to people like me, who in the scheme of things don’t make that much money. (more…)

Mannahattamamma (UAE)

After twenty-plus years in Manhattan, Deborah Quinn and her family moved to Abu Dhabi (in the United Arab Emirates), where she spends a great deal of time driving her sons back and forth to soccer practice. She writes about travel, politics, feminism, education, and the absurdities of living in a place where temperatures regularly go above 110F.
Deborah can also be found on her blog, Mannahattamamma.

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ISRAEL: International Day of Peace

ISRAEL: International Day of Peace

Each year the International Day of Peace is observed around the world on 21 September. The United Nations General Assembly has declared this as a day devoted to strengthening the ideals of peace, both within and among all nations and peoples.

In honor of today, Susie Newday, our writer from Israel, dreams of a different kind of world…

I Dream of a World

If we don’t dream, then our dreams can’t possibly come true.

Martin Luther King, Jr. had a dream that came true. Susan Boyle dreamed a dream and that came true too. And I dream of a world, a fabulous loving tolerant world that I hope I’ll be privileged enough to live and see.

I dream of a world where the dream of true peace is a reality, not just a distant dream.

Our world is anything but black and white. There is no one wrong and one right. There are only degrees of separation. We live in a world that is actually a world of vibrant rainbow colors. Yet one that, sadly, is muddied and clouded by intolerance, feuds, hate and fear.

I dream of a different world. (more…)

Susie Newday (Israel)

Susie Newday is a happily-married American-born Israeli mother of five. She is an oncology nurse, blogger and avid amateur photographer. Most importantly, Susie is a happily married mother of five amazing kids from age 8-24 and soon to be a mother in law. (Which also makes her a chef, maid, tutor, chauffeur, launderer...) Susie's blog, New Day, New Lesson, is her attempt to help others and herself view the lessons life hands all of us in a positive light. She will also be the first to admit that blogging is great free therapy as well. Susie's hope for the world? Increasing kindness, tolerance and love. You can also follow her Facebook page New Day, New Lesson where she posts her unique photos with quotes as well as gift ideas.

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EGYPT: Expressing Love to Our Children

EGYPT: Expressing Love to Our Children

I struggled, while raising my elder son, about which parenting style was best in order to raise a well-behaved child. I was struggling because I didn’t know how to balance being firm and giving him the tenderness he needed. I was raised in a very strict and conservative family and school. Love and emotions weren’t expressed in any way, only strict rules and orders. The main objective was to have obedient and well-behaved kids.

I didn’t want to raise my child the same way. I was convinced that it was important for me to show my love to my child. As my style didn’t match my parent’s style, I was criticized and blamed when my son committed any mistake because I didn’t punish or spank him. They thought that showing emotions and love was a sign of weakness. I was totally against these beliefs, and wanted to raise my son differently. But, sometimes when I was under the pressure of their blame, I found myself spanking him on rare occasions.

It has taken me many years to find out which parenting style I want to follow with my kids.

When my elder son was 7, I felt he was going through a tough time, as he had a new brother and his father and I were separating. At that time, I felt that he was suffering a lot and, although he loves me so much, I felt he was extremely angry with me.

I was consumed by my problems with his father, taking care of his younger brother, and my full-time job. I decided to consult a counselor and she advised me to hold him in my arms many times a day. In a short time, it made a great difference in our relationship and in his behavior with others, many noticed the change . It made him become more and more open, and he started to share with me his thoughts about what was going in his life more than ever. (more…)

Nihad

Nihad is an Egyptian woman, who was born and has lived her whole life in Alexandria, Egypt. She says, “People who visited this city know how charming and beautiful this city is. Although I love every city in Egypt, Alexandria is the one I love the most.” She is a software engineer and has worked in the field for more than twenty years. But recently she quit her job, got a coaching certificate and she is now a self employed life and career coach. She says, “I believe that women in this era face big challenges and they are taking huge responsibilities. That's why I have chosen my niche -- women looking for happiness and satisfaction. I help and support them in making whatever change (career change, life change, behavior change, belief change…) they want to bring more satisfaction and happiness in their lives.” Nihad is a mother of two lovely boys, 15 and 9 years old. She states, “They are the most precious gifts I have ever had. I madly love them, and I consider them the main source of happiness in my life.” Our inspiring mother in Egypt can also be found at Aurora Beams Life Coaching.

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EGYPT: The Generosity Month (Ramadan)

EGYPT: The Generosity Month (Ramadan)

By generosity month I mean the month of Ramadan, it’s the fasting month for Muslims. It’s the ninth month of the Hijri year which follows the moon movement. A new Hijri month starts with every new crescent; every Hijri month is 29 or 30 days long so the Hijri calendar is not fixed.

Every new crescent is watched (it can be watched with the bare eye in the desert) to announce the beginning of a new month. Every Hijri year is 10 to 11 days less than a Gregorian year, that’s why Ramadan is 10 to 11 days earlier each year.  So it comes almost at the same date once every 33 years, this year it started on the 20th of July.

Fasting starts from dawn to sunset. To fast we stop eating, drinking, smoking from dawn to sunset.  But it is not only a matter of eating or drinking: it’s related to all kind of desires, and they are all forbidden during the fasting day. The main objective of this month is to discipline ourselves and to be in control of our desires.  After sunset to dawn of the following day we live our life normally.

This month is very important as it is a great opportunity for any Muslim to gain extremely generous rewards for the least good deeds they do. (more…)

Nihad

Nihad is an Egyptian woman, who was born and has lived her whole life in Alexandria, Egypt. She says, “People who visited this city know how charming and beautiful this city is. Although I love every city in Egypt, Alexandria is the one I love the most.” She is a software engineer and has worked in the field for more than twenty years. But recently she quit her job, got a coaching certificate and she is now a self employed life and career coach. She says, “I believe that women in this era face big challenges and they are taking huge responsibilities. That's why I have chosen my niche -- women looking for happiness and satisfaction. I help and support them in making whatever change (career change, life change, behavior change, belief change…) they want to bring more satisfaction and happiness in their lives.” Nihad is a mother of two lovely boys, 15 and 9 years old. She states, “They are the most precious gifts I have ever had. I madly love them, and I consider them the main source of happiness in my life.” Our inspiring mother in Egypt can also be found at Aurora Beams Life Coaching.

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UNITED ARAB EMIRATES: Us. Them. How Can We Become a “We?”

A few weeks ago, standing on the sidelines at soccer practice, I was doing the mom-chat thing with a woman I’d only just met.  She said she’d lived in Abu Dhabi for about seven years, but was thinking of moving back to the UK before her older daughter started high school.

“I know it’s too early to think about it,” the mother said, laughing, “but things happen, and I wouldn’t want her to end up marrying an Arab, after all.”

Our kids were playing indoors to beat the heat, and scattered along the sidelines with us were a smattering of dads in dishdashas and moms in abayas, and some other Western parents. No one heard this woman’s comment and she seemed unconcerned about what she’d just said.  I looked at her, trying to figure out if she were joking (she wasn’t). (more…)

Mannahattamamma (UAE)

After twenty-plus years in Manhattan, Deborah Quinn and her family moved to Abu Dhabi (in the United Arab Emirates), where she spends a great deal of time driving her sons back and forth to soccer practice. She writes about travel, politics, feminism, education, and the absurdities of living in a place where temperatures regularly go above 110F.
Deborah can also be found on her blog, Mannahattamamma.

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ISRAEL: Sometimes The Right Thing Is To Be A Bad Mother

ISRAEL: Sometimes The Right Thing Is To Be A Bad Mother

As parents, I think we each have our shining moments, average moments and moments that we, unsuccessfully, try hard to forget.

And we each have those moments when we are torn. Torn between our own needs and our kids needs, be they real or imagined.

I had one of those heart “tearing” moments this past week. I have been exhausted, not feeling well and in need of some kind of relaxation, not to mention in need of some one on one time with my husband. On the spur of the moment, on Saturday night we made the decision and the reservations to go away for one night on Tuesday night. We made plans for our three kids who live at home and our other two are grown up and soldiers are in the army. I was literally counting the moments.

On Monday night, my eldest son, who is just shy of twenty-two, was hospitalized through the army. He had an ear infection that was draining and not clearing up with oral antibiotics and he was in a lot of pain. And I was torn.

I was exhausted and feeling under the weather. And while I felt I should go see how he was, as a nurse I also knew that he was okay and that it wasn’t urgent. He also kept telling me I didn’t need to come in. So my husband went to see him. Without me. (Which has to be a first for me in situations like this.) (more…)

Susie Newday (Israel)

Susie Newday is a happily-married American-born Israeli mother of five. She is an oncology nurse, blogger and avid amateur photographer. Most importantly, Susie is a happily married mother of five amazing kids from age 8-24 and soon to be a mother in law. (Which also makes her a chef, maid, tutor, chauffeur, launderer...) Susie's blog, New Day, New Lesson, is her attempt to help others and herself view the lessons life hands all of us in a positive light. She will also be the first to admit that blogging is great free therapy as well. Susie's hope for the world? Increasing kindness, tolerance and love. You can also follow her Facebook page New Day, New Lesson where she posts her unique photos with quotes as well as gift ideas.

More Posts - Website

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